A widespread problem that can accumulate anger and lower your self-esteem is to take things too personally. So today, I would like to share 6 habits that work to help you reduce stress, anger, and frustrations every time you take things too much to heart. I hope all of this will be helpful too. It starts with the reflex of:
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Concentrate on your breathing for a minute or two (or for a few breaths if that’s the time you have).
Concentrate only on the air coming in and out of your nose — nothing else.
This simple exercise will help you calm both your mind and your body. This will help to create a little space between you and what just happened. You will be less likely to have an instinctive reaction and take yourself to regret it later.
Moreover, staying centered will make it easier to respond to the situation in the most appropriate way as you would like it if you were relaxed.
Do not draw conclusions based on what you may have misunderstood; let yourself be drawn into anger and frustration. Instead, ask questions if possible to help clarify what the other person meant.
And if you can, explain what your interlocutor told you you felt. We have different points of view and different ways of communicating, and it is possible that he did not realize that it was experienced as a bit hard or rude to you.
3-Realize that everything does not concern you
It is very easy to fall into the trap of thinking that the criticisms or verbal attacks you receive are about you or something you have done. But it can be just the other person who has had a bad day, week, or year. It releases emotions and repressed tensions on you that have simply arrived in the wrong place and at the wrong time.
Remember this when you find yourself in a situation where you are likely to take things personally too much to heart.
4-Talk about it
When something happens, and you start taking it personally, you can get stuck in a negative spiral with your self-esteem getting deeper and deeper. Talk to someone close to you and let your friend share their point of view about what happened.
Maybe that person knows something about how the person who verbally attacked you is going through a difficult time. Or that person could just listen and through that help you sort things out on your own. It will also anchor you in a more balanced perspective on what has happened.
5- Ask yourself: Is there anything that could help me?
It can be difficult to ask you this question. And that may not always lead to something beneficial.
But by asking, you can sometimes make yourself responsible. You can find one or more steps to take to improve your view of the situation. You can start moving forward and regain confidence in yourself and what you can do, instead of getting stuck in inaction and replaying what has happened again and again in your head.
This advice can be especially helpful if it’s the fifth or tenth time you’ve heard the same thing. Then there may be something you would like to work on (even if it’s not very fun).
6- Improve your self-esteem
I found that as I learned to improve and keep my self-esteem, the difficulties do not fall so often on me. I do not take them so personally, and I keep a healthier perspective with distance. And so whatever happens, it tends to bounce back faster and not hang out in my day.
A simple way to start improving your self-esteem today is to be kinder to people in your own life.
You can do for this:
Help them one way or another
Listen when they need the help of a friend to find a better perspective
Give a real compliment
Encourage them when most people around them can be discouraging
The way you treat others is the way they will treat you most often in the long run. And most importantly, for your self-esteem, when you are kind to others, you tend to treat and think of yourself more kindly.